February 23, 2008 <> Jesse Loop
Response from twitter question regarding detailed notions of the psychological ramifications of divorce and annulment.
There’s some level of "trauma" for kids in separated homes. but stability is complex and can't be determined unless the whole picture is considered.
The human process in general is very complex, psychological functioning and health come from stability and love, and the stability of love.
The nurturing of any individual, despite having differing effects at different age levels, is best achieved through a system of support and complementation.
Consider complementation as a form of the verb “complement,” meaning "mutually supplying each other's lack."
Other definitions exist, meaning to provide, 1, a: an expression of esteem, respect, affection, or admiration; especially : an admiring remark.
b: formal and respectful recognition : honor
2, plural : best wishes : regards
If these definitions are applied to the development of a child by its influencing peer and “support” group, and the natural process of nurture, we can see that not only the health of the child(ren) is affected, but that the nurturing process also offers a reciprocal role to the health and well-being of the adult(s) involved. To complement one another in health and wellness; in other words.
When we utilize this manner of approach, the mutual benefit to the child and the parent creates the ideal scenario of psychologically healthy individuals stemming from psychologically healthy individual interaction. This interaction is optimal, and actions, such as divorce, create influential emotional (and physical in some cases) reactions which can, and will, to varied extents, inflict harm.
Reaching from harm to violence is, again, a scaled situation (a spectrum) where the levels of the entire process are complicated, or has complications, due to the nature of its very complexity.
The judgment factor involved in determinations of levels of harm or, conversely, levels of…we’ll use “health,” (to represent the opposite of harm) is paramount, and should be made by a networked support group of professionally trained mentors and advocates.
This network of mentors and advocates would be, ideally, in a perfect world, provided as an intrinsic social service.
Unfortunately, this idyllic and perfect world cannot exist, as it would, as outlined above, require intrusions into the rights of privacy. Any world, having intrusion into the rights of privacy, will not meet the requisite requirements of a “perfect world.”
Finally, let us not, however, be dissuaded by the fact that divorce, for example, is going to have adverse effects on our overarching definition of “health.”
There is a silver lining.
This silver lining comes from the fact that while a bad thing won’t be made a good thing, simply by the good that comes of a bad thing, good will come of all things, even bad things.
It may be difficult to recognize, but in some respects, in some regards, and in some kind of way, whether apparent or not on the surface and in the moment, it will exist.
In sum, “that which does not kill us, only makes us stronger.”
We have recently been reviewing journalistic reflections published in the mainstream mass media that involved violence towards children, or perpetrated by children or young adults.
These reflections, if you will, underscore the need for social justice, equality and a powerful movement toward serving the underserved.
- These are the omnipotent views and opinions of the author, and as such, are subject to copyright by the author. Please feel free to redistribute them widely, and give the credit to whom it is due.
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